Views under the News - 15 February 2013

The comments are probably the (fictitious, imaginary, unexpressed, tongue-in-cheek) subtext, views and events behind the News Reports, and solely intended to bring a smile to the readers. They have no connection to events and characters in real life. No offence or disrespect of any nature is intended to any person, (and especially to Indians), race, religion, community, caste, profession or sex.
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• India needs Rs. 200 bn for Food Security Bill:  Food Minister KV Thomas.
  • Does that include 10% kickbacks or not is the question.
• Ex-IAF Chief’s cousins were bribed by AugustaWestland:  Italian probe.
  • We have written to ‘AugustaWestland’ asking for details: Government.
• Can’t blame former Air Chief S.P. Tyagi in helicopter scam:  Jaswant Singh, former Defence Minister.
  • Uh Oh!  You too Jaswant?
• Law will take its own course on College Elections violence:  Mamata Banerjee.
  • Except when it involves cartoonists!
• Stop regressive trend of executions: Amnesty International.
  • Please progress to execute an order banning Amnesty International: victims.
• Pact with French Areva for Jaitapur Nuclear plant, not in India’s interest:  Prakash Karat.
  • If same deal is signed with Russia, it will become India’s vital interest.
• Our ability to tolerate is going down:  Minister Manish Tiwari.
  • Where was this guy when Kapil Sibal was threatening bloggers and tweeters?
• Bribes are necessary part of doing business globally: Berlusconi.
  • Do bribes cover bunga-bunga parties?
• SGPC against any Indo-French defence deal in view of human rights violations.
  • Gosh!  I guess J.S. Bhindranwale was a champion of human rights.
• Did you have a past with the accused rapist? Minister Vayalar Ravi to women journalist.
  • Time to ask whether Vayalar Ravi had any past in murky affair.
• Keith Vaz irks UK women MPs with sexist tweet.
  • Both Vayalar Ravi and Vaz have turned into dirty old men.
• Sex attacks on the rise in Egypt’s Tahrir Square: BBC report.
  • The reporter hasn’t yet heard of Vayalar Ravi and Keith Vaz.
• French firm Spanghero mislabelled horsemeat.
  • They should have ‘mislabelled’ it horseshet.
• Lab rats ‘given’ “sixth-sense” by US researchers.
  • M Night Shyamalan’s next movie will have Ratatouille bending Air
• Mahatma Gandhi letter sells for £115,000 at auction in Britain.
  • The ‘freedom fighter’ who sold it promised 10% kickbacks.

(image courtesy Mike Peters @ grimmy.com - from 2007)

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